Love

My Faith In Humanity Just Got A Much-Needed Lift.

Yesterday I posted a rather long rant about how people are digging America’s grave by handing over their last vestiges of financial security to the very mega-corporations that are bleeding this country dry. Also there was some grousing about how we’re teaching our children that acquiring More Stuff should be their top priority in life, instead of showing them the value of family and friends and true community.

While I stand by everything I said in that post, I have to confess that today’s post from the Bloggess made me tear up a little and reminded me that love, family and community can take many forms.

This is something I needed to read today. Give yourself the gift of Christmas cheer and check it out.

Categories: Christmas, Family, Friends, Life, Love | Leave a comment

Sampler Saturday: Dashing Through The Snow…

…In a one-Dialga open sleigh…

Elizabeth contributed the artwork for this year’s Christmas card:

I can only mail this one out to the people who will understand the funny; the rest will have to get regular store-bought cards this year.

I might frame my copy. It’s distilled essence of 12-year-old Elizabeth, a snapshot of her inner world right now, decked in Christmas cheer.

Happy Winter Holiday of Choice, Internet! May it be merry and bright!

Categories: Animals, Artwork, Christmas, Family, Humor, kids, Life, Love, Sampler Saturday, Weather, Winter | Tags: , | 6 Comments

Misty Pomegranate-Colored Musings

Sunday night we got another nice rain, and Monday night we got our first frost of fall. Yesterday most of the pomegranates on my tree had suddenly developed those little splits in their skins that means they need to be harvested soon or they’ll go to waste. So I spent most of yesterday taking pomegranates apart, putting the seeds in containers, and putting the containers in the freezer, which was…about as tedious as it sounds. But also satisfying, because around January and February a handful of half-thawed pomegranate seeds tastes like a fresh little boost of happy.

Still pretty tedious, though. The mind wanders while the hands work, and my mind had lots of time to wander on Tuesday. Some thoughts it offered up for my consideration:

1. I’m amazed at how many people see love as a weakness to be exploited. These people are seriously shortchanging themselves. Love is the most powerful force in the universe, and they will live and die without ever tapping into that vast, amazing power.

2. People have to receive before they can understand the value of giving. People have to be listened to before they can understand the value of listening to others. They have to be accepted and respected, in all their quirky uniqueness, before they can accept and respect others who are different from them. If you convince a child that her feelings don’t matter, she will grow up believing that no one’s feelings matter. Feelings either matter or they don’t. If you’re constantly telling your child not to be so sensitive whenever your thoughtless words and actions wound him, don’t be surprised if he grows up to be insensitive and thoughtless of others. If you try to teach your child humility by treating her as if she has no great value or importance, don’t be surprised if she grows up treating herself (and others) like garbage. This often involves chemical addictions and promiscuity. If you try to impose your will on your child by force, don’t be surprised if he grows up believing that might makes right. If you try to impose your will on your child through lies and manipulation, don’t be surprised if he grows up to be a manipulative liar.

3. A common misconception among Christians is that they are (or should be) somehow exempt from the natural consequences of their own poor choices. This is an unrealistic expectation. You may be “saved by grace,” but you still have to water your garden, tend lovingly to your personal relationships and feed the dog, or they will all wither and die. If you lie and cheat and steal people will stop trusting you. If you are unreliable people will stop investing in you. Being “a Christian” doesn’t absolve you of any earthly repercussions or responsibilities. It’s silly (and totally missing the point) to think it should.

4. One person’s “normal” is another person’s “completely unacceptable.” One person’s “attractive and desirable” is another person’s “eww.” What one person admires and reveres, someone else will feel nothing but contempt for. A way of life that feels like heaven to one person will feel like hell to another. What feels like glorious success to one person will feel like dismal failure to another. I don’t think there are any exceptions to this rule. To borrow Alan Alda’s phrase, “all laws are local.” You have to walk the path God designed you for, and accept that not everyone is going to understand.

So much for the navel-gazing. In other news:

5. I’m currently reading “Travels With Charley” by John Steinbeck. It’s one of the books that came with my house when we bought it twelve years ago and it’s been in my “to read” pile all this time, and I finally got around to it. It is an incredible book, and I highly recommend it if you’re interested in shrewd, amusing and often brilliant observations on human nature and eerily accurate predictions (it was written in 1961) about the impact of technology on American life.

6. I decided to make some of my kids’ Christmas presents this year, to save money. Somehow it didn’t occur to me that this would suck up the last vestiges of my spare time. If my blog goes dark for a while, that’s why. Turns out there is a finite number of minutes per day, and that number is not negotiable. Who knew?

7. A closing quote borrowed from one of my favorite bloggers, wordsmith Scott White of Caveat Emptor:

Once I met a man with a hundred hands. “It must be amazing to be able to get so many things done,” I said. “Alas,” he replied, “if only I had a few more brains and a longer reach, maybe that would be true.” Then I understood the value of people working together.

Categories: books, Christianity, Christmas, Family, frugality, Gardening, Health, kids, Life, Love, Nutrition, Self-Sufficiency, trees, Weather, Winter | 9 Comments

Sampler Saturday: Espio At Disneyland

I’m sure it comes as no surprise to readers of this blog that my children live rich fantasy lives. I don’t worry much about it; I’ve come to believe that most children (and frankly, a lot of adults) spend a fair amount of time in alternate realities of their own imaginings. I know I did when I was a child, and later as an adult through online rpg’s and such. These days my need for fantasy seems to be at a low ebb, but I get plenty of it through the eyes and stories of my kids, so maybe that’s enough to keep my imagination entertained.

Anyway. Elizabeth’s current favorite fictional friend is Espio the Chameleon, and he’s pretty much her constant imaginary companion. On our trip to Disneyland and California Adventure in August, she made observations now and then like, “Espio LOVED that ride!” or, “”Man, Espio got soaked on that that one.” I’m sure there’s some fancy psychologist’s term for this sort of imaginary attachment and projection, but when I think about all the other things that a 12-year-old girl could be getting into in this town, I count myself (and her) lucky that this mild obsession is only about a cartoon reptile-boy. (And yes, I have my own theories, but they are personal and I cannot share them with you, Dear Internet.)

So after we got back home, Elizabeth took a bunch of the DL/CA pics and photoshopped Espio into them, for her own personal collection. Here are a few of my favorites:

I love that Luke and Espio have pretty much the exact same expression in that last pic.

Nice to see Cartoon Reptile Boy had a fun time. And…that concludes this week’s glimpse into the mysterious workings of Elizabeth’s brain.

Postscript: I used to think that I have one child who loves to talk and communicate and express himself, and one child who is quiet and private and keeps her thoughts and feelings to herself. And to a certain extent that’s true, but…not really. Elizabeth has the same need to express herself and be heard that every other human on the planet has. She just does it in her own language, like, well, every other human on the planet. Elizabeth’s language is artwork, so you have to listen with your eyes and with your heart.

In the past couple of days I’ve read some articles and blog posts and seen a movie that collectively have left my heart aching for all the children whose parents never bother to learn their children’s language, or never really see or hear them at all. If you’re a parent, PLEASE, take the time to learn the language your child speaks in. It is so worth the effort, for them and for you. The future could be a much better place.

And every dad, married or single, NEEDS to read THIS. Seriously.

/soapbox

Categories: Birthdays, Family, Fiction, Gaming, Humor, kids, Life, Love, Sampler Saturday | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

These Small Hours

This one is dedicated to two of my fellow bloggers, who are having (separate and unrelated) rough times right now and are looking for some happy.

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The first time I ever heard Rob Thomas’ song “Little Wonders” was shortly after Steve and I separated. I immediately downloaded it from iTunes and played it over and over for weeks. It seemed to be speaking directly to the tangled knot of pain and hope that had taken up residence in my chest, and I wanted the knot to hear and believe, and maybe loosen its grip a little.

For a long time (like, until just the past couple of months), it was difficult for me to look at photos taken during that first year or so after the split. You could see the hope and the growing glimmers of peace and joy in those images, but my memories of the raw underlying pain were still too fresh. I looked at those pictures and remembered just putting one foot in front of the other in a determined effort to get through the tunnel and into the light.

I’ve been out of the tunnel for a while now, but I still love that song. It’s full of truth and light and strength, and if you’re ever going through a difficult time you should add it to your favorite playlists and listen to it until the sunshine comes back.

All of this is to explain that today’s Love Thursday post is in video form, and also to express my gratefulness that even the first half of the video makes me smile now instead of making my stomach hurt. Always a bonus. I’m hoping it can bring a smile or two to anyone else who needs one today.

So now, without further ado:

Happy Love Thursday everyone, and special virtual hugs go out to Jenny and Mir. Things will get better. You are loved by so many.

Categories: Birthdays, Christmas, Family, Friends, kids, Life, Love, Love Thursday, Marriage, Music | 5 Comments

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