Friends

On A Brighter Note….

Posted on March 2, 2009 by Debora

“Catholics confess their sins every week,” the pastor of our church commented yesterday. “Protestants confess EVERYONE ELSE’S sins.”

I laughed along with the rest of the congregation, but it got me thinking that I’ve devoted a fair chunk of space on this blog to bewailing the imperfections of the human race. And while the role of Embittered Wretch does hold a certain undeniable appeal at times, day-to-day life keeps tugging me back whenever I start drifting too far down that route.

So today I’ll tell a happier story about something that’s been brightening my path of late.

The church I attend is relatively young as churches go (but growing fast), and one thing that’s still being sorted out is the music program. The first several months I was there, the congregation simply sang along with prerecorded music on discs or an MP3 player. Which is fine, I’m not picky about where my music comes from as long as I get to sing nice and loud. Then a small worship group formed and began playing once a month in place of the recorded music, and that’s nice too. And then a few weeks ago a second worship group formed, and someone told me I should join it, and I’m in a place right now where I Listen To The Voices, so I joined it, and that has turned out to be surprisingly fun. We get together twice a week to practice, and perform at the church on the first Sunday of each month. The first performance I was part of was nothing to write home (or blog) about, because there were still a few bugs in the live-music amp setups and also our group was still very small. But right after that we gained three or four new members, each of whom totally rock their instrument of choice, and the sound system got upgraded, and yesterday? We sounded mighty fine, if I do say so myself. I’m really glad I decided to give that a shot.

On a similar note, the youth population at the church has EXPLODED in the past year, so now they have a shortage of Sunday School teachers. I dodged that bullet for as long as I could, but last week someone came up and asked me directly if I would teach one class per month. And it’s not like I HATE the idea of doing that, it’s just that I really really enjoy the services and hate the idea of missing any of them. But considering the pathetically small amount of money that I can afford to tithe (I think it just about covers the donuts my kids wolf down every Sunday), it seems like I should be giving SOMEthing of value back to the church. Also the pastor’s sermons are available on a free podcast at the church’s website the next day, so I’m not REALLY missing anything. So it looks like I’ll be wearing my Schoolmarm hat on the last Sunday of each month, and I hope that turns out as well as the worship group thing has.

Last but by no means least, the weather here has been intoxicatingly springlike this past week. I’ve begun turning over the garden beds, and over the next few days I’ll start planting cool-weather crops like garlic and lettuce and swiss chard, stuff that won’t be bothered too much by the occasional late frost. It’s still a bit early by Anza standards, but my gut tells me that the worst weather is behind us. I mean, it’s not like we haven’t gotten our money’s worth of winter this year, right?

There’s just something about springtime that makes everything feel fresh and new and possible.

And I’m off to the garden…

Categories: Christianity, Friends, Humor, Life, Love, Music | Leave a comment

Ripples

Posted on January 31, 2009 by Debora

I think part of the reason I haven’t been blogging as much lately is because somehow along the way I’ve become reluctant to share the beginnings of things without knowing where they’re going. I don’t necessarily want to talk about some new direction my path has taken until I know whether it’s an onramp or just a cul-de-sac.

But that kind of defeats the whole purpose of personal blogging, doesn’t it? Journaling is ABOUT the path. It’s not like anyone ever really ARRIVES anywhere anyway. I think a blog should celebrate — or at least document — all the little steps that lead from Point A to Point Q and beyond.

Back in August when the new school year began, I was kind of foundering emotionally. You may have noticed. Steve and I had just had our final not-even-attempting-to-be-friends-anymore break, all of my close old friends lived in other states that joint-child-custody rules prevent me from moving to, and I was beginning to realize that the group of local friends I’d been reconnecting with were basically all part of the same…culture, social strata, lifestyle, etc…as Steve, and deep down they really saw nothing particularly shocking or even unusual in his behavior.

I desperately wanted to move forward, but I was at a loss as to how or where to go.

On a whim, I volunteered to help out with a school fundraising project. That led to meeting a woman who invited me to join her walking group. And that led to meeting other women and hearing about a church they were sure I’d like.

It didn’t take me long to figure out that school fundraising projects aren’t really my cup of tea, and I had to let the walking group go when I added up how much I was spending on gas driving to and from the meeting-place every morning. But the church was definitely a keeper, and I would never have gotten there if I hadn’t taken all those other steps that led me to it. Everything is relevant, is what I’m getting at.

I have more to say about the church and what a wonderfully healing thing it’s been for me, but I think I’ll give that its own post later.

*****

On the ranch front, Steve has hauled all of his cows and calves out of the Trinity pasture and will soon be taking the corral panels out as well. Right now his cattle are in his home arena; some of them will be going to the sale and the rest he will be putting in with his dad’s herd across the street. In other words, he’s not so much “getting out of the business” as “cutting me loose to sink or swim on my own.” And that suits me fine, now that I’ve sat down and planned out most of the logistics. I’m actually pretty excited about the whole thing.

*****

I haven’t written much about Mahogany this winter, mostly because the things I’ve been working on with her aren’t really edge-of-your-seat material. But we’ve made huge progress in that simple but crucial ability to pull a bridle over her ears without the whole rodeo thing going on. Anyone who’s worked with horses knows what a big deal that is. At the risk of totally jinxing myself, I will venture to say that Mahogany’s INTENSE ear-handling issues might be completely a thing of the past by the end of this summer. That would be pretty sweet.

*****

My quest to grow as much of my own food as possible is expanding this year with the addition of several new crops and edible landscape plants, but I think that merits another post all its own too. It’s a pretty big subject, and one that I have a lot to say about.

*****

So I guess this post is about small beginnings that may or may not grow into big changes. You make a decision to put an oar into the water and the ripples begin to spread out in unpredictable ways.

I love that life is like that.

And now I see some sunshine outside that needs to be soaked up. I’d better go take care of that….

Categories: Christianity, Family, Friends, Gardening, Horses, Life, Ranching, Self-Sufficiency | 3 Comments

In The Week When Christmas Comes, Part 2

Posted on December 29, 2008 by Debora

For some reason my interest in blogging is in an (almost certainly temporary) waning phase. It’s not that there’s nothing going on in my life; actually I think it’s the very fullness of my days and the expanding network of connections to the people around me that have made me less dependent on this forum as a social outlet.

I’ve no plans to stop blogging, but it’s no longer the emotional necessity it once was, thank all that’s good and merciful.

Anyway.

After we’d opened our presents Christmas morning and had some breakfast, I dropped the kids off with their dad and his parents and then headed over to spend the rest of the day at my friend Jenny’s house. That was really nice, and the food and company were great. In the afternoon it started to rain, and I was worried that it might turn to snow or ice and keep me from getting home that night, but I was having too much fun to leave until about six when it started getting good and stormy. I got home with, um, minimal and easily reparable damage to my silly little car, stopping on the way to pick up Luke, Elizabeth and the piles of loot they’d gotten for Christmas from the Silkotch clan.

The day after Christmas my uncle Vaughn came up to Anza for a visit. He’d been living in Colorado, but my grandfather passed away a year ago, and Vaughn and my father are currently in Victorville in the process of putting the estate in order. Vaughn stayed with us Friday and Saturday night, and even came to church with us Sunday morning. It was a nice visit, but I’m afraid he got an inaccurate impression of typical Anza weather. The longest deep-cold snap I’ve ever seen up here finally broke the day AFTER he left; we spent most of his visit huddled around the woodstove for warmth. This mobile just wasn’t made for that sort of climate. I can’t wait until I’m able to completely replace the walls with something sturdier than cardboard and aluminum foil.

We’ve had no real plans for New Year’s Eve. Just today I found out that there’s going to be a party at Casa Gamino, and I’d be tempted to go to that since I can take the kids, if Steve’s band weren’t playing there that night. I suppose eventually that sort of thing won’t impair my enjoyment of a night out, but I’m not quite there yet.

Jenny and I had decided that if nothing more exciting presents itself between now and then we could all get together at my place, so that’s currently the plan. I went shopping for supplies today, so if something better does come up for New Year’s Eve my pantry will be fully stocked with snacks well into 2009.

In general life is very good and very peaceful, which I much prefer over having lots of drama to blog about. I feel like I’m on a path, and I can’t see where it’s headed, but I can see that it’s definitely headed SOMEwhere, so I’m just walking in faith and enjoying the view as I go along.

If I don’t post again for a while, HAPPY NEW YEAR! May it be filled with love and joy and health and peace for all of us.

Categories: Christmas, Family, Friends, kids, Life, Weather, Winter | Leave a comment

In The Week When Christmas Comes, Part One

Posted on December 27, 2008 by Debora

Sorry about the radio silence. I’ve been really enjoying the holidays this year, and loving the freedom to try new ways of celebrating.

The kids’ Christmas Vacation (excuse me, “Winter Break”) got off to an early start this year on account of being snowed in for what would have been the the last three days of school. By the official beginning of the break they were suffering from a nervewracking mix of cabin fever and Christmas anticipation, and it seemed like I was dealing with one ridiculous squabble after another. I recalled that we’d had a similar situation last year, and had solved it by letting the kids have one early gift to keep them occupied. I decided that that was worth turning into a tradition, and we busted out the jumbo tub of Tinkertoys that had originally been meant to be a Christmas gift. Brilliant! They played happily with those and the bickering ceased.

And by the end of that day they had created this:

blgntrprs

It’s the Enterprise 1701, of course. Just brings a tear to a mother’s eye.

Our traditional Christmas Eve consists of opening one gift each and then watching The Muppets’ Christmas Carol together. I LOVE that movie.

This year was a bit different: we each opened our gift and then we went to church for an evening candelight service. That was wonderful, and will definitely be a regular part of our Christmas Eves from now on. Then we came home and snuggled up and watched The Muppets’ Christmas Carol, and I cannot remember a year when I’ve felt more deeply attuned to its sweet message of love and thankfulness.

And then the kids went to bed, and I stayed up till the wee hours wrapping the last of the presents and putting them under the tree along with the various items that don’t get wrapped. We always have several toys that are arranged, unwrapped and ready to be played with, beneath the tree after the kids are asleep. These are things that are either for Luke and Elizabeth to share, or there’s no question of who they are meant for.

blgchrstmsv08

We had another new twist this year, and frankly I found a bit baffling.

I’ve never ever told my kids that Santa Claus was real. I’ve told them the stories, of course, and we read “‘Twas The Night Before Christmas” every year, but I’ve always said that it was just a fun story people like to tell.

Last year, when Elizabeth was at the age when few kids still believe anyway, both of my offspring began peppering me with questions about how I really KNEW that Santa wasn’t real. I stood my ground on his fictional status, but they seemed unconvinced.

This year they specifically stated that they wished to receive one present each from good St. Nick himself. The implication here was that my blatant unbelief had been keeping him away all these years, and that I was to Knock It Off immediately and let the jolly old elf do his bit.

Fine. Who am I to squash my children’s holiday fantasies? I bought a whole ‘nother roll of fancy wrapping paper, snuck it into the house, and on Christmas Eve I wrapped one gift for each child plus one for the family in this Special Santa Wrap. Then I faked guy handwriting as best I could for the To/From tags. If I’d been a bit more on the ball I would have taken the tags to church and had an actual guy write them out, but one can’t think of everything.

I actually slept in pretty late Christmas morning, and the kids let me because they were happily occupied with the contents of their stockings and with the unwrapped stuff. Come to think of it, that may be why we started doing it that way in the first place. Sometimes an extra couple hours’ sleep is a gift unto itself.

Speaking of which, I’m off to bed. To Be Continued…

Categories: Christianity, Christmas, Family, Friends, kids, Life, Love | Leave a comment

Snowed in

Posted on December 20, 2008 by Debora

…still. We’re on Day Four now.

snwdin1

snwdin2

snwdin3

If I had a real car that weighed more than 75lbs I would be able to move about freely by now, but my little toy Saturn is rendered helpless by the few inches of snow that remain. A fellow from next door helped me drive/push/coax it as far as my back gate where Steve’s truck tracks end, so I think I should be able to make it to church tomorrow. Funny how much I’ve come to look forward to that every Sunday.

Yesterday my nice neighbor, who has actual grownup vehicles, was able to get out and into town, and she brought me some milk because we were running low. I have been constantly surprised and warmed by the kindness of people. In retrospect I cannot believe how socially isolated I let myself become during my marriage.

Snow damage toll: several trees lost branches, but there’s nothing too catastrophic. My stand of redshank took the heaviest damage and the big pine in my front yard comes a close second, but least nothing landed on the roof.

My house is very clean right now. I’ve had nothing else to do.

This seems like a good time to pull out all the bits and pieces that I’ve thought would be cool to blog about but weren’t worth having posts of their own. Like how Elizabeth was Student Of The Month in November, and how I’ve had to lock all the chickens back up because one bold coyote got hungry enough to come right onto the property and start stealing chickens out from under my dogs’ noses. He got two pullets before I realized what was going on and locked up the henhouse.

* * * * *

Things the Internet magically knows about me:


In a Past Life…


You Were: A Happy Go Lucky Monk.

Where You Lived: Alaska.

How You Died: Decapitation.

I can totally believe that I was a monk in my past life. I can see myself now, quietly tending my garden in some sunwashed courtyard, the gentle warbling of birdsong providing a peaceful soundtrack to my simple contemplations.

But ALASKA? I. think. not.

Decapitation? Absolutely, if I lived in Alaska. The other monks got fed up listening to me whine about all the damn snow. It’s just a question of which one of them snapped first, and what sharp utensil he was holding.

* * * * *

Other things the Internet magically knows about me: I am Probably A Woman.

We guess https://dsilkotch.wordpress.com/ is written by a woman (52%), however it’s quite gender neutral.

Gender Analyzer

* * * * *

Anagrams for “Debora Silkotch:”

Horseback Dolt I. Hmph.

Cobra Hiked Lost. Okay.

Bad Shock Toiler. Heh.

Rabid Sock Hotel. Whoa there, all our socks are freshly laundered, thankyouverymuch.

Broad Chokes Lit. Everyone’s a critic.

Ethics Look Drab. Some days…they really do.

* * * * *

Here are some Google search terms that brought folks to my blog recently:

how to sleep with mice in house

Try my method: get cats

5 fosmo rules

There are rules?? Crap, I’ve probably been doing it all wrong!

“christmas” “words” “list of”

“I’ve” “included” “this one” “only” to “mock” their “unnecessary use” of “quotes.”

expecting hard what will happen to my watermelon

I feel you, my friend.

what the hell moments

This person definitely came to the right blog.

mummified baby in glasses

Um. I got nothing here.

coloring for canaries

Dude, just give him some old newspapers to read like everyone else does.

upbeat christmas snogs

I could use a few upbeat Christmas snogs myself. Where’s my mistletoe?

men in ballet flats

I…have nothing to add to that image.

* * * * *

If there were any chance of anyone seeing me naked in the foreseeable future, I would totally want to do this:

suntat

* * * * *

And I think that’s all I have today. Must go huddle in front of my woodstove now and thaw out my fingers.

Categories: Christmas, Family, Friends, Humor, kids, Life, trees, Uncategorized, Weather, Wildlife, Winter | 2 Comments

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