Regarding Elizabeth

Last week I helped out at the kids’ school, making papier-mâché props for a musical production that Elizabeth was in. These are the two I helped build, “Sky God” and the tree:

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The play was last Thursday night. Elizabeth was in the soundtrack section, and did a fine job on the xylophone:

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Friday after school I picked the kids up from school and we headed down to Temec to run some errands. Elizabeth needed a haircut and some new boots, and we wanted to see “UP” (which btw is a fantastic movie). The whole afternoon was a lot of fun…except for the boot-buying experience, which was thankfully AFTER the haircut and movie and a very nice lunch at Souplantation. The boot thing? That was harrowing.

What happened was, Elizabeth saw these:

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You can’t tell from the pic, but they are covered in a fine glitter that makes them sparkle in the most delightful fashion. They were adorable and Elizabeth passionately loved them and I would have been happy to buy them for her…except that they weren’t available in the size she needed. They were available in the size she was already growing out of, and also in Much Too Big. I did not want to pay that much money for either of those sizes.

There were tears, and angry words, and finally what in Elizabeth-World passes for a full-on tantrum (which is intense but at least relatively quiet, much like Elizabeth herself), and finally I just picked out a pair of boots identical to the ones she was already wearing but a half-size larger and bought them and we got out of there.

Then there was fuming. That made the rest of our shopping so much fun!

Later that evening, when Elizabeth had gotten over the worst of her disappointment, we got into another squabble over some unrelated something. Since Elizabeth and I don’t usually squabble much at all, I’m pretty sure it was leftover grouchiness spilling over. At one point she actually frowned and declared, “Mom, you have spoiled me rotten and you’re just going to have to accept the consequences.”

I just sort of blinked and stared at her for a minute. Then I said, “You feel that I have spoiled you rotten?”

She shrugged in a rather cavalier fashion. “I’m a spoiled brat. It’s too late for me to change now. You’ll just have to get used to it.”

“Wow,” I replied. “Most eleven-year-olds, especially the spoiled brat variety, aren’t able to see that about themselves. I’m kind of impressed.”

The thing is…as eleven-year-olds go, I really think Elizabeth is near the lowish end of the brattiness scale. I mean, she has her moments, but I don’t know anyone who DOESN’T have the occasional moment, especially in that age bracket. And while she has most definitely inherited her father’s egocentric view of the world, I think for the most part she chooses to use it for good and not for evil.

And then sometimes she just digs her heels in and becomes the proverbial Immovable Object. Like with the parade float thing.

Around Easter our church’s youth music director put on a great production called “The Secret Of My Success.” Both Luke and Elizabeth had speaking parts and solo singing parts as well as singing with the group, and they both did really awesome. Now there’s another production in the works for July, and they were both given large speaking and singing parts. Which they were fine with, until they realized that being in the play meant that they’d also be riding, in full costume, on the church’s float in this year’s Anza Days parade. Elizabeth said she wasn’t going to be on the float, she was going to be on the sidelines watching the parade, and that was final. I told her that I’d be helping out with the float that day so if she was going to watch the parade it would have to be with her dad, and I do not know what his plans are for that day. She said she’d take her chances. No amount of discussion has changed her mind. Luke does what Elizabeth does, so if she isn’t going to be on the float then he doesn’t want to either.

Of course I could ORDER them to take the speaking parts and ride on the float, and they would do it, but that’s not the kind of parent I want to be. There would be no joy in the play for them or for me under those circumstances. So, as disappointed as I am that they won’t get to show off their acting talents this time, or ride in the parade, I’m not going to insist.

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And from the “What The Heck?” category, yesterday Elizabeth…wait, this one needs some backstory. Okay, a couple of weeks ago Elizabeth ate asphalt on her roller skates in a parking lot and got a big ugly scrape down one arm, near the elbow. Somehow THIS of all things is embarrassing for her, so for the past two weeks she’s been wearing long-sleeved shirts to school even on sweltering hot days so the other kids won’t see the scrape and ask questions.

So yesterday she wore a red shirt. While she was at school she cut out carefully-shaped pieces of paper and stapled them to the chest and sleeves of her shirt so that it looked something like this, but red:

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I just about fell out of the car laughing when she got off the bus wearing that. When I could breathe again I pointed out that she’d taken quite the risk, walking around in that shirt.

“I know,” she nodded philosophically. “I lived, though.”

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Ah, my girl. You are simpler and more complicated than Luke. You are simpler and more complicated than me. I’m pretty sure you’re more intelligent than I am, but so far I have the wisdom and experience on my side. I pray you’ll survive long enough to acquire them too.

But in the sweet name of basic self-preservation, leave the red shirts at home! There’s just no sense in tempting fate that way.

Categories: Artwork, Family, kids, Life, Star Trek | 7 Comments

Roundup Part 2: Short And Sweet

When you have a roundup to work a total of three calves, the preparation takes longer than the actual job.

Brooke hauled Stormy and Mahogany to Trinity for me in Doc’s rig, since I haven’t driven a truck in over fifteen years (Steve never let me drive any of his), and I don’t think I’ve EVER driven a truck that was pulling anything. Doc and his two cowboy friends had just finished setting up the corral when we got there. Then Brooke took my car to her house just up the road to pick up two of her kids, and got back around the same time John and Raeanna arrived.

Bringing in the herd took the longest. They were Resistant to being corralled, and we only had five horses, and Mahogany hasn’t had much practice with cows so she wasn’t terribly helpful.

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But eventually we got ’em in.

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Turned out we actually had four calves, but the newest one was only a few days old and too little to really torment yet, so we’ll brand and castrate him next time. He was just the right size to help John get a feel for calf-handling, though.

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I love the smell of burning cowhide in the morning!

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Castrating turned out to be messier yet less nauseating than I’d expected. OF COURSE I had my first effort thoroughly recorded for posterity. Here’s one of the less-gruesome pics:

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When we were all done one of Doc’s friends entertained us with rope tricks.

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Then we loaded up the steer and the horses and headed home, where Brooke and I got the steer ensconced in his fattening pen. Poor guy misses his buddies.

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And that was my very first roundup as Sole-Herd-Owner-Person. I could not have done it alone, and my heartfelt thanks go out to the folks who helped make it happen. Everyone seemed to have a good time, and they all said they wanted to come back for the next one, so I think this cow business thing is looking absolutely doable. I want to buy my own corral panels so I don’t have to keep borrowing Doc’s, and I need to practice driving a truck and trailer rig so I can haul my own horses, but those things are also doable. I mean, if I’ve learned nothing else this past year I’ve learned that with God ALL things are possible.

Life feels pretty good right now.

And now I need a shower.

Categories: Animals, Christianity, Friends, Horses, Life, Ranching | 3 Comments

Roundup Part 1: Amazing Grace

A cattle roundup is a fairly simple thing to organize, if you have the manpower and resources and skills available. You set a date, tell your friends, and when the day arrives you usually end up with more help than you need: riders, ropers, sorters, muggers, castraters, branders, cowboys, people who like to play cowboy…it’s almost more of a social get-together than a job, and everyone mostly shows up for the fun.

Of course, if you have just spend the past year of your life starting over almost from scratch, and none of your new friends have ever thrown a rope or castrated a calf — and neither have you — then a cattle roundup becomes not such a simple thing to organize. In fact it becomes A Tad Complicated.

I had offers of help from my friends, and I deeply appreciate that, but how do you catch and hold down a calf without ropers? Well, you can buy a calf table, unless your car happens to suddenly die and require over $900 worth of resuscitation. Yarg. Also, if you understand the process of calf castration but have never actually done it yourself, how do you know for sure that you won’t throw up and/or pass out halfway through the procedure? And, oh yeah, how do you even get your horses to the event if you don’t own a trailer or a truck that will pull one? Then there’s the matter of a corral. You can’t have a cattle roundup without a corral to round them up into, and Steve had taken most of the livestock panels with him, and I couldn’t find anyone with used panels to sell, and new ones cost $140 for a ten or twelve foot section. That would add up to roughly a gazillion dollars, which I didn’t have (see: car repair bill, above).

If I let myself think too much about all this stuff I might have started worrying that it wasn’t going to work out at all, but fretting about that sort of thing is a total waste of energy. All I could do was commend the whole matter into God’s hands and trust that things would happen the way He wanted them to. I was just AWARE of the issues, is all I’m saying.

In mid-May I approached a horse vet who goes to my church, an incredibly nice fellow who had come out and treated my horses in the past. I didn’t really know him socially but I figured as a vet he’d at least be able to give me a hands-on tutorial in calf castration, if he were so inclined. So I asked him, if he were theoretically invited to a roundup, would that be just another day at the office for him or would it be something he’d enjoy? His face lit up, he said he LOVED doing that stuff, and that if I needed any other skilled help he could bring some more friends. I said I could really use a header and a heeler (cow jargon for two different kinds of roping skills), and he said they’d be there and what day was the roundup? I told him I’d hoped to wait until all six calves had been born, but that I might not be able to because the firstborn was getting so big. He said no problem, we could have one roundup now and another one later on and that way we could have twice the fun. Also, as it turned out, he had a pile of spare corral panels that he’d be happy to bring over and set up for the day.

I was SO FREAKING GRATEFUL, but he very graciously acted like I was doing him and his friends the favor of having them out, so I couldn’t even feel awkward about accepting all that help.

A few days later I got a message from the Doc’s secretary: he and his friends would be available to come out on June 6th, and did that work for me? It worked perfectly for me, but most of my other friends couldn’t make it that day. I decided that in this particular case I should probably accommodate the doc, and I’d schedule my next roundup far enough in advance that everyone else who wanted to come could be there.

That only left the matter of getting my horses to the roundup site, then getting them AND a steer back to my place afterward (the steer was coming home for fattening and slaughter). This would require the use of a large stock trailer with a center divider: we could put the horses in the front section and the steer in the back. I mentioned this need to a woman from my church who was helping me through the ridiculously complicated process of filing for divorce, and she immediately picked up the phone, called a friend of hers who lives in my general area, then hung up and announced, “Okay, we’ve got the trailer, now we just need a truck.” She was already dialing a new number; this time she was calling Geoff, the new guitarist in our worship group (I’ve been corrected on the spelling of his name). She basically told him that he and his truck would be hauling some livestock for me on June 6th. He had already promised to come and help with the calves if it was on a day he was free, so I wasn’t too awfully horrified by this casual drafting of resources…just mildly taken aback. But when I saw him the next day at a meeting he’d remembered that he had a previous commitment on the 6th. He said we were welcome to use his truck, he just wouldn’t be available to drive it, and while we were working out the logistics of that the Doc mentioned that HE had just the sort of stock trailer I needed, and I was welcome to use it AND his truck since he would be using other vehicles to get his panels and horses to the roundup.

The grace of God and the goodness of people absolutely blow my mind sometimes.

Next: the big day!

Categories: Animals, Christianity, Friends, Horses, Life, Ranching | 4 Comments

Wordless Wednesday: Catalpa In Bloom

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Categories: Gardening, Life, trees, Wordless Wednesday | 1 Comment

A New Song Unto The Lord

When I first joined the BackCountry Worship group in February, it was very new and small and still finding itself. We’ve gained a few members since then (and lost a few), and over the past three months it’s sort of taken on a life of its own and become something kind of amazing.

I have to confess, when I first started singing with them the songs themselves didn’t resonate very deeply with me. I’d grown up on the old Baptist hymns, and that had always been my own personal conception of sacred music. The songs I was learning now were different: mostly newish stuff that plays on gospel radio or upbeat versions of hymns I’d never heard before. To me they were just words and melodies to be learned, notes to be mastered.

“Days Of Elijah” was the first ‘church song’ I loved enough to buy from iTunes for my own personal listening pleasure. I think it’s impossible not to respond to that song, I love the energy and power of it. Sometime after that I started buying all the songs our group was practicing, because it was quicker and easier for me to learn them that way and I could practice at home between meetings. Pretty soon some of the worship music was finding its way onto my regular everyday playlists, and these days the songs I sing while doing housework and gardening are more likely to be worship tunes than my old rock or country favorites.

Recently I was singing along with my newly-downloaded mp3 of “Blessed Be Your Name” when the actual spiritual sense of it hit me unexpectedly. Deeply. The profound TRUTH of it sank in: that joyful peace that comes from keeping a faithful and thankful heart no matter where your path has brought you on any given day.

There are really no words to describe how much this group and this music have come to mean to me. I look forward to our twice-a-week meetings not just just as a time to practice music, but as gathering in worship and fellowship with a handful of kindred souls who share a deep and genuine love for the One we come to honor.

The last time I blogged about them we’d just lost one of our guitarists and our male vocalist, but since then we’ve gotten a new guitarist and our prodigal singer has returned to us. I think there was an audible click the first time this new configuration got together to practice. It feels very right.

Here’s a pic Elizabeth took of us during practice before church yesterday:

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My peeps. On the far left is John, a vocalist. If John were to write his autobiography it would probably fall into the horror genre, and yet he is one of the most joyful people I’ve ever met. I get the impression that his walk through the scarier corners of the Valley of the Shadow and back up into the light have left him pretty much afraid of nothing. Next to John is Susan: worship leader, guitar and vocals, and our collective moral compass whenever we lose track of why we’ve come together. Next is Annie, Susan’s teenage daughter, a delightful creature of light and life with the voice of an angel. I am fairly certain that little singing cartoon birds help Annie get dressed in the mornings. Annie occasionally gets into an odd Mood and starts flinging snarkiness in all directions; this is entertainment of the highest order. Behind Annie is Marie (bass guitar), but you can’t really see her from this angle. Marie is the still water that runs deep: she doesn’t talk a lot, but when she does it’s worth listening to. Next is Jeff, our new guitarist. Jeff is actually the one who told me I should join the worship group, way back when, but he wasn’t able to play with us himself until his employment situation changed a couple weeks ago. I don’t know him as well as I do the others, but he seems like a very likable fellow. Next is me (vocals), and heaven knows we’ve already read enough about me on this blog. Moving on we have Other Jeff. He’s not technically a member of the group, but he sat in with us yesterday and rocked the bongo. On the far left is Robert on drums. A man of few words, but his drums speak quite eloquently on his behalf. For such a quiet guy he can seriously get down with his bad self on that drum set.

One of these days I’ll get a CD of our music and post a song or two here. I’m thinking “Blessed Be Your Name” would be an excellent choice.

Categories: Christianity, Friends, Life, Love, Music | 3 Comments

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